It finally happened

Whelp I had that I’m a crappie parent moment today. I spent 90% of my day regretting my decision. 

Maybe I didn’t think this all the way through. Maybe I am being selfish. Maybe this is gonna cause my child more damage than I can comprehend. Maybe I shouldn’t have taken this job. Maybe I me being too doggone positive and need to cut my losses. Maybe this ain’t such a bright idea. 

One of her teachers…an American at that…made me feel like a complete failure and I’m ignoring the signs of my child being miserable. I stood there as I listened to her talk about how my child didn’t want to do the work and says she’s frustrated and confused about the work. She shouldn’t be confused because English is her first language. So I go check on her. She’s doing work and seems fine. Then I just happen to walk by and she’s in the hallway crying her eyes out saying she wants to go back to the states. The teacher had pretty much planted this idea I  her head that she misses being in the states and now I got an upset child. Now I’m popping mad. I take my kid and calm down. I breath and start thinking about my options.

1. Quit my job (not happening)

2. Homeschool her (maybe)

3. Send her back to the states and I stay here (even less likely to happen)

So my hunt to homeschool becomes a more serious hunt. I’m not gonna have my child be emotional and there was not a problem. It’s been 12 days at school a month in new countrymen 

I have done a damn good job at trying to keep things normal for her. I will not allow you to question my decision because what….I’m a single parent or you just don’t understand it. 

See here’s my thing. I am providing an experience for my child that people can only dream of doing. I took deep thought and prayer before making this decisoin. I even talked with her about it to gauge her feelings on it. 

Does she miss some comforts of the states? Yes mostly material things like her lego dimensions. (They don’t sell them here) 

Does she miss her granny? Yep but she gets to call her and as soon as granny figures out how to video chat…BAM

She’s been to a new school every year since she was 4. I’ve told her we’ll stay put until she finishes 5th grade and then we’ll decide where to go next if we leave here. 

People get on my nerves and I will not allow that negativity into my space or my child. 

Consider this your one and only strike. There’s no 3 strikes and you’re out with me when it comes to my child. 

2 thoughts on “It finally happened

  1. Jackie Robinson says:

    That was just rude and disrespectful.
    You are a great Mom. She will remember this time for years to come. Yes, she does and will miss the states, her family ( mostly Nanny) and friends, and yes it’s scary to her I’m sure. I’m sure if you haven’t you will have some of those same feelings.
    She will be alright and then when she’s gotten over it……….it will start all over again.
    You just stay strong and know you are a GREAT MOM!!

    Like

  2. Sherrill says:

    I think you are doing an amazing thing. I wish I was as brave as you. She is getting to experience something people only dream of. If you decide to homeschool her she will do awesome, if she stays at school she will do awesome!! You are a great mom and Elise is lucky to have you and this experience.

    Like

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